Reading the Title of this blog and my previous posts, any ardent reader of my 'work' (someone out there can validate my over-inflated self-perception?) would assume that this is going to be a long post about how marriage is a patriarchal institution and love merely an illusion, pushing us towards the accepting permanent gender performative roles.Man, actually that does sound like a great idea for a blog and totally resonates with what i am going through right now.
I got married! yeah, it's not to someone i have loved for the past few years or whatever- i chose the traditional path of an arranged marriage- my parents choosing guys off the internet (sounds creepy but well, it was!) and then making me talk to them, or meet them in a weird twist of roles (IRONIC, i might say, considering that us girls are supposed to never even look at a guy before- but such is the way of us Indians).
I got married! yeah, it's not to someone i have loved for the past few years or whatever- i chose the traditional path of an arranged marriage- my parents choosing guys off the internet (sounds creepy but well, it was!) and then making me talk to them, or meet them in a weird twist of roles (IRONIC, i might say, considering that us girls are supposed to never even look at a guy before- but such is the way of us Indians).
Life is strange. I was told by my family astrologer that i would end up married by April 2018 and as any independent, logical women of the 21st century - i scoffed at this prediction. Foremost because i had no intention of getting married then (this was around July, 2017), But here i am, married (somewhat happily?) and now what do i know? Do our stars actually align in a way that such predictions can be made? Or is it because the astrologer said so, that my parents put in all their effort to find someone; considering the threat he implied that if i don't get married by April- the 'shubh mangal' will return after 2 years.
Long long story (maybe for another blog entry) short, I did get married. I do love the guy. He is decent enough (man, i hope he never reads this description :p) Rest assured, that from a love point of view, i will hold my judgement for now.
Long long story (maybe for another blog entry) short, I did get married. I do love the guy. He is decent enough (man, i hope he never reads this description :p) Rest assured, that from a love point of view, i will hold my judgement for now.
But marriage is so bloody different from love. Its everything i dreaded and everything i dreamed of. I am still struggling in the job and academic aspect of my life and that obviously means i am at home the entire day. The in-laws have also visited. The thing is though that there is a reason theory is sometimes just that- theoretical. As a well-read feminist, i already know the patriarchal underpinnings of most arguments and division of labour that takes place in my new household. How does one handle it? Do i fight it and make it an issue? What is ultimately good for mental peace?
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