CLASH OF THE CIVILISATIONS: WHEN MODERNISATIN = WESTERNISATION

There is a very fine line between modernization and westernization. We as Indians have always been in awe of the westerners since the colonial times. During the colonial times, this was obviously more visible. People of high castes and class would wear coats and shoes like the British, they spoke like the British, they walked like them, and they changed their table manners and now ate with forks and spoons like the Englishmen. They now preferred a Victorian ideal of companionate marriage where the women was a fine blend of self-sacrificing Hindu wife and the Victorian helpmate. By doing what the British did , the Indians thought they were on the path of progress.  We wanted their ideas, their style of living and even their kind of western toilets for the sake of modernity.

Even after so many years after independence, things really haven’t changed. Though we deny it, we still look up to the Western countries to show us the way towards modernity.  . Recently there was an article in a magazine about line-in relationships and open marriages.  It called such social institutions “modern love”.  Something our parents obviously will never understand as they are “backward”.  More and more people are now adopting the practice of “open-marriages” where both partners have a certain understanding wherein they can explore their relationships with others outside of their personal arena of marriage. The new generation has now come to this bizarre conclusion that marriages and commitment to one partner is a hurdle to their expression of individuality.  The system of live-ins and open relationships, according to them, gives them their own personal space and freedom to think, that marriages cannot offer. They need more choices in life, more opportunities. One of the most ridiculous notions that are prevalent is that an ambitious woman favors this kind of a “modern love” so that she can do whatever she wants to.  All these concepts have been taken up from the West, their culture, their literature and most of all their TV shows.  Just because they show such love as a workable system doesn’t mean they are. Just because they are involved in it doesn’t make it “modern”.  Committed relationships and marriages are a portrayal of a stable society and love; it is not “old-fashioned” as many people propose it to be. I am not against people who participate in such “modern love”. Everyone has a right to be happy, to devise their own ways for satisfaction, and if being a partner in an open relationship gives them what they want from life, so be it. What I am critical of is such social networks being called “modern”. We need to understand that westernization doesn’t always equate to modernization.  The fine line between them blurs, and we just end up copying the west. Just because the English and American TV Networks show people having multiple partners, doesn’t make it modern.

Then again Society is complex and social relations are contradictory. There is no one way to analyse it. Our own social context shapes our opinions, beliefs and expectations about society and social relations. There is no ideal vantage point from where such social networks can be inspected. I am not passing a judgement on any individual or institution; this is just my way of observing the world. I believe that at this point ; when there is a clash between the Western and Eastern civilization we have to be very careful in adopting new practices and social systems. We should not follow a foreign culture and call it “cool” or modern. We need to make our own systems in co-relation with our customs and tradition. That is what will make us unique and distinct from others.